Life between two homes is difficult for children who have always lived in one home. You can help them through this transition time by showing them that this can be a positive change if they adopt the proper attitude.
One thing that children worry about is how the transfer from one home to the other is going to work. They may also wonder how much time they will have at each home. Letting them know this information quickly can help them to feel better as they make the adjustments.
Plan for contact
Being able to contact both parents is often something that concerns kids. They will worry that they can’t talk to the parent who doesn’t live in the home. In order to address this, you can make plans for open communication. Knowing that they can call, text or message the other parent when they want might help them to feel better about this aspect of the transition.
Give them space
Having a space that they can call their own at each home can make them feel more comfortable. Ideally, the children will have a room, even if they share with their sibling. If this isn’t possible, you might be able to give them a different area of the house, such as a dresser. The area needs to be able to hold the items that they will leave at your home, including toys, clothes and other personal items.
Model behavior
You will have to show your children that everything is going to be fine. Having a positive outlook on things and relaying those points to the children can be beneficial to you and them. It might help if you plan down time when the kids are with you. It might be tempting to always have activities going, however, the kids do need time to relax. Have a movie or game night at home to let them build memories while they have time to decompress.
Work with your ex
Presenting a united parenting front can also help the children to adjust to the new way of life. In order to do this, you need to have established standards for communication. These must include the requirement of remaining respectful. It should also note that the children can’t be used as messengers between parents.
Your parenting plan is the document that outlines things about scheduling and communication requirements. Making sure you have this in place as soon as possible after the divorce ensures that everyone is on the same page regarding the terms of the arrangement.