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A parenting marriage as a divorce alternative

When the intimacy between you and your spouse ceases, you might assume that you need to divorce. If you still love them, this might not be a pleasant thought. You do have a different option. You might choose a "parenting marriage" focused on the children that is void of physical intimacy.

First, you have to realize that a parenting marriage isn't a failure. You are remaining together for your children. Since you get along with the other parent, this is a good way to enable the kids to continue to live with both parents without the parents having to connect with each other intimately.

Second, you need to ensure that there are ground rules. These are important because if one spouse begins to seek intimate relations with the other one, things can spiral out of control. Instead, it must be clear what's going to happen so that everyone has realistic expectations.

Third, the household dynamics are likely going to change significantly when you are in a parenting marriage. You and your ex might not be as attentive to the other as you were before. This is normal, but it does require you to adjust your thinking and actions.

Finally, your spouse might not be willing to accept this type of marriage. When you have resistance, you might decide that you should go ahead and file for the divorce. As tough as it is, this might be the best option to give you a fresh start in your life and to help your children avoid stressful situations caused by the tension between their parents.

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Shumate, Flaherty, Eubanks & Baechtold

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Richmond, KY 40475

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